Friday, March 18, 2011

Skin care regime

I was watching an old episode of Oprah and she was interviewing a beautiful actress who has entered her older years. Oprah was asking her how she had managed to keep her skin looking so amazing despite the fact that she is now in her 70s. At this point, the actress (and I honestly can't remember who it was) launched into a detailed description of her skin care regime. It started with the fact that she doesn't do a thing in the morning before moisturizing and she went on to describe her scrubs, toners and facials.

By this point, I am cracking up. My skin care procedure is only in place because I would kick myself later on if I did nothing now. I take off my makeup, moisturize and am devoted to SPF like a good girl.

I am sure there will come a time in my life that I can take care of my skin in the morning before I do anything else, but it certainly won't be here for a while. I am guessing I have another ten years before I even get to brush my teeth immediately upon waking up. Right now, I am tending to a crying baby, a sleepy-eyed toddler and a preschooler. Most days, I am lucky to get a shower before 10:30. In a few years, I'll be rushing to get everyone up and dressed for school.

As for my end-of-day routine, I am barely standing by bedtime. You really think I am going to stand in my bathroom to do a glycolic peel? I don't think so. If I am going to trade my precious sleep for anything, it will be a good book or some writing time. I'll accept the crows' feet and the laugh lines when they come. I'll know that I could have done just a bit more to prevent them, but I made the choice to get some sleep instead.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Just like dating

I never had to do the grown-up dating thing. I met my husband in college when it was easy to meet people and dates were low-key. I have never had to go out on a blind date or scan the crowds looking for someone who looks like a good match for me. Until now.

I am just going to throw this out there - finding other mom friends is just as hard as dating. I know that a friend is not on the same level as a life partner, but they are almost as important. Life sets you up to get married when your friends get married and have babies when your friends have babies, but it doesn't always happen that way. So, what happens now?

For the first time in my life, I am being set up on a blind date. Kind of. My brother is "setting me up" with a new friend from work who, like me, has young kids (almost the same ages as mine), a husband from another country, has a job in addition to raising a family and happens to live nearby. I may just start calling my brother On paper, she and I are the perfect match. No doubt we will have a ton to talk about. But, what if we just don't click?

When you are looking for a partner, there are a lot of things that have to fall into place and the list of criteria is different for everyone. When you are looking for a mom friend, the list can get more complex. It starts with the things that you look for in a friend, but then you have to add in other factors because there are other people involved. Do your kids get along? Do your spouses get along?

You and Other Mom may get along great, but if your kids don't like each other, you limit your interaction to girls-only outings and double-dates. If your spouses don't have anything in common, you cut it down to coffee outings to blow off steam pent-up from days spent with the kids.

Now, having friends who you only see over coffee or dinner are great. I am not knocking those friends (especially since this constitutes most of my friends); however, I hope that, someday, I can find a few friends to get together with as families. The kids will be happy. The spouses will be happy. The mothers will be happy - and that is really all that matters anyway.